13 years.

That's how long I have been captured and enveloped by the world of Harry Potter. That's how long I've been reading the books over and over again, watching the movies whenever I needed to escape from the stress of real life, discussing, thinking about, and sharing a world whose traits and philosophies have completely changed my life. And now it's all ending.

I feel like this post is 100% necessary. I MUST write down in words how I'm feeling at this time. Because it's a sad, immobilizing feeling and a sad, distressing time. I know that the final film will wrench my heart out and I'm pretty positive it will be my favorite film of all of them, because it was my favorite part of the books. But I don't want it to come. Nope. Not yet. There is no other feeling in the world like the anticipation for the next Harry Potter trailer, book, or movie.

But at the same time, I want the world to see it so badly. I feel like the whole purpose of Harry Potter will become clear to the general public and non-fans by means of this last film. There is a meaning so deep and statement-making that has yet to be revealed to those who don't know how it ends, and perhaps now Harry Potter will get the TRUE respect it deserves. Not to say it's been disrespected, but I feel like the world still doesn't truly get it. Not like we do.

I think that after the film is over, I'll be in a state of shock, but it's not like I'm losing anything. These books and films will still be a part of my near-everyday life for the rest of my life. Yes, I will miss the midnight premieres. They are so special and so moving because you know that it's a once-in-a-lifetime kind of thing and something we will all be telling our kids and grandkids about. Being in a huge room full of people that share this same love that you do; a pure love and understanding for something like the love of the Harry Potter fandom is so rare to find. Even when I go to concerts, for example, everyone there usually ranges from pretty excited to mildly interested, with the exception of about 10% hardcore fans. Not the case with Harry Potter. EVERYONE has the same love, passion, and understanding of why they are there. We're all on the same wavelength and you can make friends with people you wouldn't have ever thought. Because, personally, I feel like if you "get" Harry Potter the same way I do, we probably have a LOT more in common than just that. I will miss the midnight premieres more than anything.

Mostly I'm just so, so grateful to have lived through this. I've grown up with the actors, so thus I've grown up with the characters on-screen. And it's been a fantastic way to grow up. Each film has felt appropriate for the time that it appeared in my life. This last one the most so.

PAINTING

in my underwear, drinking bitch beer, and listening to my favorite music

YAY

an update! and Tim Gunn

I've been doing some shopping. Time for a haul!



Brown shorts and black nail polish from Forever 21. It was about time I got some black nail polish. I love how it's no longer attributed just to scene kids or goths. I remember my mom flipping out about me wearing it when I was thirteen.. :) The only thing about it though is that I'm reeeeally bad at painting my nails, and since it's so dark, it makes that fact pretty obvious... With lighter colors I can get away with it.



This cute white eyelet shirt from J. Crew. It was originally $80 but I got it for... wait for it... $13. SCORE. I always pass up J. Crew because I assume it's way out of my price range, but the sale stuff's really not!



And last, this beautiful sweater from Anthropologie. On sale for $30. Couldn't pass it up - I could just picture how wonderfully easy it will be to throw on for classes in the fall. And Ryan bought me the cutest little teddy bear in the whole freaking world! Her name is Shelly.

Also, a certain awesome man was here in Salt Lake on Saturday.





Tim Gunn! He gave a brief fashion talk at the Gateway. It was pretty sweet :) Definitely made me want to catch up on some Project Runway...



As for everything else, I just plan on working A LOT and getting things checked off my lists :] Plus my parents are coming up to help me paint my apartment this weekend. Can't wait to do a before/after post! Went and picked out colors today. It's gonna be cuuuuuuuuuuuute! I may even re-think moving out in summer 2012, we'll see ;)

cannons

top and scarf: Forever 21; jacket: Anthropologie

Can you believe this is still the general wardrobe here in Salt Lake? Where is the sunshine?!

I'm listening to the band Little Screams, recommended to me by my boyfriend. They aint bad.

I need coffee! Headed off to Coffee Garden to do homework and delve further into the spring issue of Bitch magazine. I took a chance on it and it's unbelievably good!

isn't it strange how we change

top and jeans: Forever 21; cardigan: Urban Outfitters

Yep, it's strange. I was looking at Anthropologie today and remembered how when I was in high school, I'd heard about Anthropologie so I checked it out, but I was left unimpressed. Now it's my favorite, I would simply kill for anything in that store!

I'm getting sick of my straight hair... it looks unnatural. I think I'll go curl it before class...

I had a wonderful weekend of beautiful bands. Pictures soon!

Why every girl should love the Gilmore Girls.

Gilmore Girls is one of my favorite, favorite, FAVORITE shows. (I have about three favorites, and I love them all for different reasons.) But this one just blows my mind how great it is, and it also blows my mind how common it is that people (especially girls) aren't that into it!

I've been buying the seasons as I get through them. I've seen every episode so far through season 3. I am savoring the newness of the stories! They're THAT good! (And since I'm only that far, I will be keeping this spoiler-free.)

I've also been thinking a lot lately about feminism again, and guess what I realized? Feminism and Gilmore Girls go hand-in-hand. Here's why.

Lorelai and Rory Gilmore are top-notch feminist characters. They represent women in a way that encourages strength, independence, intelligence, and individuality.

It seems that in a very overall, general way, the whole point of the show is to show that women can stand alone just fine. Sure, one of the main subjects of the show is both Lorelai and Rory's love lives, but never, not once, are the girls controlled by the men in their lives. As it should be! They fall in love, but they never take that as a synonym for having someone protect them or that they are now complete human beings. 100% feminist!

Their personalities are also on the feminist wavelength. Their wit is beyond measure - making so many historical, political, and pop-culture references in each episode that a reference guide is included in the DVDs to maximize understanding of each joke. They're hilarious - a trait that's rarely attributed to women. In this article from Paste Magazine, only two females make it on the Top 10 Best Comedians list. Comedy is also generally targeted to men. When I googled "best comedians," the first link that came up was to guyism.com. ALL ten were men on this list. I'm also reminded of a Bill Maher video I watched recently where he bashes feminism and makes a comment on the sexes in television, saying that on sitcoms, the wife is usually the enlightened, intelligent character, and the husband is the "dumb fuck who's lucky to have her."

Here is the link; I don't want to post the video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N4iHCfuRWIQ

It's a valid observation, but really, the husband also usually happens to be the funny character and the main character. He's the character that gets all the laughs, and when it's a sitcom, it's the character that makes you want to watch the show. The wife is just there as the voice of reason, a simple plot device. With the Gilmore Girls, they are both intelligent and funny; they are complete human beings.

Even greater still, this isn't a feminist-type show that glorifies women and breaks down men. The male characters are all interesting individuals. Especially Luke - the man that Lorelai and Rory get their coffee from more than once a day and who has hidden feelings for Lorelai. He has basic, strong male traits but only really as a background for his more likable and unique traits on the forefront that challenge and break down male stereotypes - he's a health freak, he hates technology, he's a nurturing type of father figure toward Rory, etc. He has a "soft side," if you will, but he's still a guy in a flannel shirt and a backwards baseball cap.



I'll end here because I could go on forever. I hope everyone (male and female) can enjoy this gem of television and see why it is so important for the modern woman.

45 DAYS

I need to stop the YouTubeing, I THINK I MIGHT DIE FROM EXCITEMENT.

something new...

top: Anthropologie; shorts: American Eagle; shoes: Forever 21

...A legitimate outfit post!

I have been deeply longing for a pair of tan shorts (because summer is approaching so quickly eee!) but I thought I had to wait because I'm very low on cash. Then I remembered I had these shorts from American Eagle!! I never wore them because they used to be a longer-ish bermuda type shorts, and they were completely unflattering, but I just altered them, and now I'm in love :)

So, the point of that story was... I started trying on a bunch of outfits with my "brand new" shorts, and I started to realize... it really is time to start a legit style blog. My daily headshots are just getting way too boring. So I grabbed my webcam and took some pictures. Horrible quality, I know! :( You can't even SEE my shoes. But these were taken at night time, and the quality is always worse at night. We'll see how it goes during the day.

Let's see if I keep this up ;)

i got soul but

shirt: Forever 21

There's really nothing for me to blog about. But I'm super-procrastinating my homework. LEAST appealing thing in the world right now. I can't decide if I should make some coffee and do my homework until 3 in the morning or just screw it all. Hm. I'm so interesting.

Currently obsessed with:
The Suburbs
April
Little Big Planet 2
Gilmore Girls (except that's always)
checking Mugglenet every hour in hopes of a DH2 trailer (to no avail)
Anthropologie housewares
the idea of cleaning my apartment

when there is nothing left to pretend

top and cardigan: Forever 21

I think I'll do a rambling blog post, because I haven't done one in a while and it's good for the soul and I'm buzzed.

This picture ^ obviously isn't from today because I went to work today. My usual longer-than-usual Saturday shift. And I have that familiar, gross after-work feeling on my skin and I should probably shower but I'm getting drunker by the second! So that's a no on that.

My boyfriend's in Vegas right now for his best friend's bachelor party! How strange is that. I thought it'd be a MUCH longer time before I start going to my friends' weddings and seeing them get married! But alas I live in Utah and it's inevitable. If I'd stayed living in Las Vegas it wouldn't even be brought up yet; I wouldn't even dare to start thinking of marriage myself. But alas I have. My co-worker and I were talking just today about how baby-hungry we are. And I'm 19! 19! Just keep your babies out of Zupas please. They're too adorable and they're ruining my life.

I've been looking at apartments lately and dreaming of my next place, (bigger, cleaner, newer, more efficient) but I think I just forget how much I love my apartment. All the little details that come directly from my soul and my life; it's my little sanctuary. I've dreamed of a place like this, where I can paint and make a mess and play my music and display my art and art that I love. I wouldn't trade it for the world. The one thing I would change is that I could have a little puppy. (You know, to hold off the baby feelings.) It would make a world of difference! But I guess that's just one more thing to look forward to.

I also must have this book:



Flipped through it at Anthropologie and it has given me a new perspective on diaries and altered books.

T-MINUS FIVE DAYS UNTIL APRIL! Let's make a list of every single amazing thing in April, shall we? Because I think it might just be the most beautiful month of my life.

April 1: Wye Oak concert @ Kilby Court
April 5: my sweet boyfriend's 24th birthday!
April 8: My Chemical Romance concert @ In The Venue
April 9: Creed and Brittany's wedding in St. George
April 11: Arcade Fire concert in Orem
April 12: Glee returns!
April 15: Deathly Hallows Part 1 on blu-ray!
April 17: drive to Parowan, chill out with family!
April 18: Blake's play in Parowan
(somewhere in here, my mom's coming up to help me paint my apartment)
April 28: U of U orientation! and last day of class at SLCC!
April 30: Tim Gunn @ the Gateway!

Is that beautiful or what?

Off to play some Little Big Planet 2.

--

In a endless night would you feel the fright
of the age that wasn't, could never be?
So we hold it close when we feel the most
like a love that we could not leave behind.
We turn the wheel to which way we feel
till our thoughts lift; I cannot find you there.
Don't forget the nights when it all felt right.
Are you not the same as you used to be,
used to be?


Victoria Legrand you are everything I long to be. Free and beautiful and ethereal and different and intriguing.

30-Day Album Challenge: Day 11

Day 11: Favorite Pop Album
The Fame Monster
Lady Gaga



This album is the best part of Lady Gaga so far. I used to really hate her when all she had was The Fame under her belt, and I don't really like her videos, and I don't really like her outfits. But I REALLY like this album. Lady Gaga has a way of taking something very musically ordinary and making it awesome and her own thing. You can see and hear the convention that was put into producing the album, and you can see how Lady Gaga twisted it to match her very own vision. My favorite part about her is that she's an actual icon of our generation, and we have very, very few of those. She's more talented than most pop singers; she can actually sing - better than Madonna, her biggest comparison. And The Fame Monster delves into a number of relatable topics through its nine short tracks.

I just love that an artist can put out something as horrible as The Fame, and then realize "Hey, that really sucked. Maybe fame fucked it up for me." And then create a response truly timeless and breathtaking. It's a real act of humanity.

Favorite tracks: Bad Romance, Dance in the Dark, So Happy I Could Die

i'm the hero of this story

Don't need to be saved.

where do we go now but nowhere

While trying to decide on an outfit today, I realized I've gotten so bored with my wardrobe! Sure I've added a few nice, high-quality pieces, but I miss when I would get a few new things every week. So I decided to go out and buy a couple things! As luck would have it, I found a great PLAIN BLACK CARDIGAN from Forever 21 for less than $10. I've been searching for you for ages, pretty little cardigan.

Now I'm poor. Ah well.

30-Day Album Challenge: Day 10

Day 10: Favorite Rock Album
Elephant
The White Stripes



I had no idea how to answer this one. I obviously thought, The Beatles? Way too easy. But I thought eventually throughout this challenge I absolutely have to pay my respects to The White Stripes so here we are. And they are definitely a band I can label simply "rock."

My very favorite White Stripes album by far, it blows my mind every time I listen. It never, ever, ever gets old. The stripped-down idea of the White Stripes makes them completely timeless, and I'll be listening to them when I'm 80. The whole world will. Jack White's rhyming and rhythmic skills are so perfect, meshed with screeching guitars and riffs that feel like they could be from any of the last few decades or the future.

I. Fucking. Love. The White Stripes.

30-Day Album Challenge: Day 9

Day 7: Worst Album Cover
Congratulations
MGMT



I know there is some pretty hideous album artwork out there, from low-budget rappers and whatnot... but I'm only going to take from my own music collection.

Sometimes I'm down with the whole hipsters-trying-to-be-ironic-with-ugly-things thing... but this is just so horrendous. As an aspiring graphic designer, it just makes me cringe a little. It also doesn't depict the sound or idea of the album (not that that's the greatest thing either.)

30-Day Music Challenge: Day 8

Day 8: Favorite Album Cover
Many

I decided I'd go through my music collection A-Z and pick out my favorites. Turns out, I have way too many! I got to D and I already have way too many. Here's just a few. Maybe I'll come back and add more.

30-Day Album Challenge: Day 7

Day 7: Least Favorite Album of Your Favorite Artist
The Black Parade
My Chemical Romance



Whenever I feel the urge to listen to my favorite band, this is close to never the album I choose. I love theatricality and I love concept albums, but The Black Parade is just a little too much, almost on the cheesy side, and lyrically the weakest. On their other albums, there's maybe two or three tracks that I'm not that fond of. On this one, there's maybe two or three tracks that I actually like. So, they kind of missed the mark. I feel like it was probably just a strange time for them to be making music; they had just made something so true to themselves and went over so well with their fans, that they had to think, "What do we do now?" And this is what came out. And the reason Danger Days is so good is because they're now out of that funk completely and have grown up as musicians and people. Still love 'em though. Three out of four aint bad.
Favorite tracks: Welcome to the Black Parade, Teenagers, and Famous Last Words

30-Day Music Challenge: Day 6

Day 6: Favorite Album As A Child
No Strings Attached
NSYNC



YEP THAT'S RIGHT. I'm taking "as a child" as say, age 7. I effing loved this CD. I miss the days of synchronized dancing and when every man's hair looked like a briar patch. Am I totally listening to them on youtube right now? Perhaps...



I remember seeing this video all the time on Disney Channel! I think it totally foreshadows an Oscar-worthy film in Justin Timberlake's future, don't you think?

mountains beyond mountains

jacket and necklace: Anthropologie; shirt: Forever 21;

YO! Only three more days of classes 'til spring break! Stoked! I'm not doing anything that exciting except maybe taking a trip to Parowan and my year-and-a-half anniversary with Ryan :) We're going to Forage and going to a ballet. Definitely expect a blog for that day! :)

I can feel the anticipation for April building up! Seeing my two favorite bands, Ryan's birthday, a wedding, the Deathly Hallows blu-ray, my mom coming up to help me paint my apartment, it's endless!

Speaking of my apartment, I rearranged the furniture this weekend. And every day I wake up and think "Why didn't I do this sooner?!" It's SO much more open, and I didn't even take out any furniture! It got me thinking about design more and more, and I've spent far too many hours in the last few days on Apartment Therapy. Here are some of my very favorites:











It's funny; no matter how much I say I love color, I guess I'm always drawn to more neutral rooms with subtle colors. I'm the same way with fashion too. I do love color, but colors that are found in the earth.

Also when it comes to design, I really like clean lines and the minimalist style but I'm also still extremely drawn to messy-ish bohemian sanctuaries. They seem almost opposites so it could be challenging to try to blend the two. I just want my apartment to be full of style, no matter what it is exactly. I want nobody to question that a design student lives there :)

30-Day Album Challenge: Day 5

Day 5: Last Album You Bought
Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys
My Chemical Romance



I don't buy music... ever. I know, I'm horrible. This is the only tangible copy of an album I've bought in a very long time, and this was back in November. But seeing as this is the first new album in four years from my favorite band, I had this shit pre-ordered.

And I've already given all my thoughts on this wonderful little album. It's fantastic. It's fabulous.
Favorite tracks: The Kids From Yesterday, DESTROYA, Na Na Na, and Bulletproof Heart

I will be seeing these boys for the first time in 5 years in exactly one month and one day YESSS

30-Day Album Challenge: Day 4

Fell behind, oops!

Day 4: First Album You Ever Bought
The Used
The Used



The first albums I remember buying were a set of a few different ones. I asked for about 5-10 CDs for Christmas, and this was one of them. I also got Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge, some Atreyu album, Gwen Stefani's Love. Angel. Music. Baby. and a few others. (Pretty eclectic, I know.) But if I recall, this is the one I was most excited about getting, and I listened to it the most. To this day it's still the best Used album; I think it's always pretty awesome when a band's first album is their best by far. (But also sad in a way, to have to watch them just go downhill after that. In the last few years I haven't taken a second glance at The Used.)

I guess this album introduced me to music, in a way. And for being 13 years old it's not the worst place to start. The lyrics are obviously relatable to an angsty 13-year-old, and when I moved to Utah I felt even more connected to them. And even recently, I'm learning more about my connection to this band by living right by the town they grew up in and sing about. I think their blend of catchy tracks and more metal-influenced songs on this album is near perfect. For the 2000's teenager, it's an essential.
Favorite tracks: On My Own, Pieces Mended, and The Taste of Ink

30-Day Album Challenge: Day 3

Day 3: Last Album You Listened To
Sigh No More
Mumford & Sons



I was just wondering why this band suddenly became SO popular. Sorority girls like it. Moms like it. It's on the Top Albums on iTunes. And now I understand why I never liked it much. I'd always heard the name around the hipster community but had never heard them, so I downloaded this album and listened. Wasn't impressed. Oh well. I'll let the majority have it.

So happy I could die.

I have one piece of advice for women everywhere: If you do not have a pair of jeans in your closet than you can rightly call "dream jeans," then please, GO OUT AND FIND THEM! Seriously. They have changed my life.

Last night we got frozen yogurt and talked about music all night. It was good times. Now my entireeee weekend is dedicated to studying for this math test. I'm so scared I'm not gonna pass that class :( and I'll have worked so hard for nothing... It's the one thing bringing me down these days; the uncertainty is kiling meeeeeee. And I was really sick this last week so I fell behind in Humanities and I just feel like crap about school :( Buttttttt only one week until spring break! Much needed.

30-Day Album Challenge: Day 2

Day 2: Worst Album
The People's Key
Bright Eyes



I can't really say I've listen to any albums that could qualify as "worst album ever," so I'm going to rename this "biggest disappointment."

I'm not even sure what Conor was going for with this. I couldn't even get through the whole thing. Just so bad :(

30-Day Album Challenge: Day 1

Stole this from some silly Facebook thing :) But I thought it would be a fun thing to do on my blog. So!

Day 1: Favorite Album
Funeral
Arcade Fire



I'm bad at explaining the hows and whys of why I like certain music. Especially music like this, where it is just simply beyond me and our world. But then I remember that real people created it, and that's what helps me relate and blows my mind away.

Beautifully constructed without being too structured, full of heart and anguish and a great sense of longing. The Suburbs won a Grammy, yes, but that one was definitely on bottom below Funeral and Neon Bible. Funeral deserves all the recognition in the world. Everybody should hear it. From the mesmorizing intro (fills me up with joy whenever I hear it) to Regine's incredible vocal finish, it's just...simply...a masterpiece.
Favorite track: Neighborhood #1 (Tunnels) or Rebellion (Lies)